"when i look your not there but when i close my eyes your everywhere...."

Its been 2 days in a row that I dreamt about her.Am I seriously in love with her? Probably.The fuck up part is that I notice myself wanting to sleep all the time or at least close my eyes.Like the tittle says when I look she's not there but when I close my eyes my god she's always with me even if she probably doesn't want too.Who can blame her I probably freak her out with my ugliness or something.

Been suffering from mindblasting headaches that could kill you I swear to god.But by the grace of god I have no idea how I manage to cope with it.I slept at 4 this morning and woke up at i dont know 8?I'm going to watch Champions League tonight Zenit St. Petersburg vs Juventus at 1.30am Brunei time(Nov 26) and straight after that game will be Villareal vs Manchester United and kick off is at 3.30am which will end around 5.30am so I'll probably sleep after that and I have to idea what time I'll wake up.Subject to change though if I find something else to do between now and 3.30.But I am definitely watching the Manchester United game.

Anyway moving back to the first paragraph.Gosh I miss her soo much and I don't think I'm allowed to tell her or tell her how I feel.Not going to risk everything.Yes its hurting me very badly but what the heck its life if you don't suffer you must be doing something wrong that's against the will of god.A million words couldn't describe how I'm feeling and I could never talk to her about this I just go blank and cant find a single word to describe how I'm feeling.


"I'm wishing old wishes like wishing you'll be back again..."-Alister.T